When you’re on your own, and not socializing, you hear a lot of voices, sometimes negative, either about yourself or others, it can drive you insane. Any negativity, unless you’ve got the stomach for it is annoying, at least when you’re depressed and trying to stay positive about yourself and others. In order to have a positive attitude you need to achieve, and in order to stay positive you need not worry what others think, think your own thoughts not theirs. That doesn’t mean only worry about yourself, not others, in fact putting the needs of others before your own is helpful when you’re going through a difficult time, to concentrate less on yourself & your problems & be more in active productive, helping others is simply one way of being productive that translates to feeling better about yourself and others, less worried about what others think about you or in general. Always concentrate on your own thoughts, if negative from where do those voices come from and why, to what issues trigger those replies you hear in your head, if negative ask yourself why & deal with those feelings piecemeal, one at a time until you find a strategy for overcoming that feeling & the corresponding emotion or voices that follow. Always be in control of your mind, know your body, how it responds, and what you need to do self care wise to maintain stability so that negativity does not overpower you cause you to self harm. Love you first, loving yourself means staying proactive & disciplined when it comes to self care, the less you care about yourself the less others will care about you. Always rise above, in your head not others, on your path not question another’s, live your dream not another’s, think your thoughts not what others think, and most of all care always for others and yourself, the more accepting you are of others the easier it will be to challenge, overcome, & not be easily affected by any voices including ones produced on your own.
Always best to be conservative in your approach, never to mock, mimic, categorize, role play, cite to, cliche, take on any roles or positions that give way for inference of any inside jokes. Always be weary that was is like, gets compared, and what is similar to gets judged more critically. The greater the likelihood of occurance, the higher the scrutiny, the less likely the occurance, the more lenient of judgments are passed. Be careful not to omit information in the public eye, as information omitted is deemed inference for weakness, or at issue, not recollected out loud so as to hide or conceal information. Must remember every statement made and and make clear, or later clarify previous statements made within the context of the given discussion, with directions as to how related if related at all, and whether important to what degree and towards what conclusion. These are not general defenses in life when it comes to public speaking, but are important pin points for reference when every statement by you is made, what to keep in mind, to protect yourself from harm and unreasonable assumptions made and inferences as to your purpose, your life, your identity, your causes, and your disposition in life now in terms of how it differs from your circumstances prior, always explain yourself, your current condition, and anything relative to understanding all sides better, not just your own.
Never reveal your weaknesses in public. Weaknesses are used to judge you in the negative and test your character, your worries are your own, never share your worries or questions about others including yourself in life. What you have yet to figure out for yourself about yourself is no one’s business but your own. What you like, who you like, and you you’ve liked is your business no one else’s. People interested in digging for dirt, only dig for information to justify their negative judgments of you, without a complete understanding for why you are the way you are, prefer you outcasted to better themselves, appear better than, stronger then, to intimidate you when really it’s the other way around, they’re intimidated by you but unwillinging to admit your happiness and success threatens them, that’s why women attack women. Women attack women to put others down in order to look, feel, and appear better than superior to. Why, because the only thing that makes insecure women feel better than others, is to look better than others. Women secure with themselves don’t need looks or to worry about Image in order to get a man and keep a man. It’s what’s inside that counts, personality and confidence are everything.
When you experience any type of loss in life, its devastating. I’ve lost every Man I’ve loved to other Women or ideas of perfection & beauty, undervalued not appreciated, treated as not good enough. That type of loss, is a loss of self, self esteem, and confidence. There’s a difference between between that kind of loss, superficial and the loss of a person or life of a loved one. Do not confuse the two, there’s a big difference. No matter how much loss I’ve endured in life, I’ve been taught to always see the positive & be appreciative of what I do have in life. People cannot be replaced, clothes, boyfriends and anything else superficial can be replaced, no loss so grave as worthy of causing a loss of self, or esteem so grave ad to cause loss of confidence resulting in hardship & failure deemed permanent. If it could lift you up, you can lift yourself up, if it supported you, you can support yourself, if it gave you shelter from negativity, you can shelter yourself from negativity. No loss should result in loss of control of self. You are always able to rebuild yourself if you try, focus on people not things, and value one another’s worth, not devalue one another for superficial means that you should already be able to provide for yourself.
You can try to plan all you want for the future but sometimes things do not always turn out as we had planned. When things don’t turn out the way you expect them to, either because your judgment is off or the judgments held towards you are, something better will always come along. Everything happens for a reason, things can only get worse for so long until they become better, have faith in that process. In order to learn from your mistakes and grow as a person, you must realize what it is that you can be doing better, what it is that you do well, and what it is that is keeping you from achieving your goals in life. No one can change for you when you experience failure, that is something you must figure out on your own. Know your strengths when weak and focus on what you have when you feel lost, and you will always find your place in life. You are only off center for as along as you allow negativity & failure to keep you from moving forward, when you are most centered occurs when mindful of your needs as well as the needs of others, and everyone around you achieving, including yourself. This is not always the case, but when it occurs, appreciate those moments in life and never take them for granted. You should not only do as well as those around you, you should always be able to achieve in life with or without the comradere of success, you are not required to lead when up or teach once accomplished, but you are always required to be humble once you get there. In order to help others you must first help yourself. Success comes to those who are patient & disciplined. Just because one plan doesn’t work for success does not mean everything is a failure, learn to roll with the punches, sit with what you’ve got, and learn from your mistakes -building from within what is lost until everything you think and feel comes to fruition in life for you, nothing achieved comes by surprise but by careful planning, steady progress, and a willingness to adapt to changes along the way which determines your success. You are defined not by failures, but by what you achieve in spite of failure, which way you go when you hit a hurdle in life demonstrates your strength of character, whether you go up or down in life when met with hardship.
When you’re off on your own, it’s easy to get discouraged, and lose faith. Always keep yourself busy. We lose faith in ourselves and others usually when we are not confident, not disciplined, needy, and feeling less than or not good enough. Part of finding confidence and stability requires you to be okay on your own and fearless. Afterall it’s easier to be around someone who is stable rather than someone who is tripping. Usually unstable people are viewed as being problematic or risky, and quickly disassociated from, that’s normal, that’s business. People who are caretakers tend to be more empathic & understanding, not concerned with image and risk, more concerned with helping others, strengthening those around them. So when you’re down be understanding that not everyone is going to be willing to help you, and that’s okay, some people are not going to be there for you and that’s okay too. Don’t take anything in life too personally, just always do your best to be thankful & grateful for those that do help you get back to normal.
There are times when we are strong and there are times when we are ineffective at expressing ourselves and our emotions. Sometimes we get through to our audience and sometimes we feel misunderstood and get frustrated. Those are all normal feelings, apart of the writing process. It’s important to be clear, helpful, but not aggressive when explaining yourselves to others. The angrier you become the less likely you are to be heard, the more sound you are the more likely you are to be understood. It is rare when looking for empathy that you will find it. If you’re looking for empathy that means you’ve already lost your audience and their respect for you. In order to regain composure, one must look to their strengths & sources of support for feedback and direction, or else remain forever lost fighting with people who not only not understand you but don’t empathize with you and never will because they’ve already made up their minds about you not to care and may never care. Those who never care to understand may nevertheless be the ones to most question you for responses, that helps no one not even themselves, nor the writer or the writers audience, but just used to highlight neurosis and character weaknesses and points of defect to justify themselves as rationale. Anyone who depends on another to justify a feeling or rationale is in no position to pass judgment, spread rumor, or claim to know information as fact because not yet asserted or defended against. Usually what’s not of issue is left last for explanation and discourse. #Orlando